Wednesday, February 1, 2012

marriage & the ordinary ever after

a few days ago, i was in the produce section at the grocery store, and there was a couple nearby. probably somewhere around my age. as i made my way to the ruby reds, i overheard her mentioning to him a few interesting ingredients for a recipe that was far over my simple culinary head.

and as i took those few steps in the outskirts of their moment in time, i wondered if she knew this ordinary day with him would come. an outing with prince charming of pushing around a rickety grocery cart . . . a far cry from their sunset strolls along the beach like days gone by.
and i couldn’t help but wonder if she was disappointed by this unromantic, ordinary task.

after having noticed their together in the ordinary, i started to think about the ordinary-ness in marriage. and how unprepared we are for it.
in fact, we become afraid of it.
how could these mundane tasks do anything but leech our starving souls?

our culture has succeeded in teaching us at an early age that a thriving relationship means a thrill ride through life that takes our breath away. in good ways, of course. therefore, when the ordinary rises its unappealing head, as it always does, we start to wonder if there’s a problem.
because where did the thrill go?? . . .

and then, when ugly invades our lives and batters our hearts, we can experience pain so deep it takes our breath away.
not the thrill ride we had in mind.

but what if . . .
what if we embraced the ordinary?
even celebrated it.

because it’s easy to revel in the highs of life with our spouse.
but it’s a selfless act of sacrificial love to embark on the mundane.

and that.
is extraordinary.

our souls are sacred ground, friends. so when we invite Jesus INTO our mundane, we find Him there.

and suddenly, that rickety grocery cart, that kitchen sink, that small cubicle – isn’t ordinary anymore.
it has become a place of worship.

it has become extraordinary.
because He is in it.
scroll back up to the top and take another look at the picture.

see that couple?

when my husband and i grow old together, i hope that’s what you’ll see.
two souls experiencing the ordinary – together.
walking through life – side by side.
hands positioned for servanthood – ready to help share the load.

and me rockin’ the purple pants!


  1. We were talking just the other day about how much we enjoy just being together, sitting in the same room reading, or out for a walk, or even cleaning up after dinner. I love the "fun" things we do & enjoy the special outings/trips, but I'm so thankful that we both just enjoy "being" together.

  2. The ordinary becomes extraordinary because He is in it. This is exactly what Ann Voskamp speaks about in her book One Thousand Gifts. I love this post Tanya. Have your read Ann's book? It has helped me to look out for the multitude of gifts that God gives me everyday, amongst the ordinary. Sitting on the sofa together, squished in top to toe, him reading a magazine and me on the laptop is my idea of ordinary/extraordinary bliss with my hubby. It's so refreshing when we start to look for the extraordinary in the mundane-ness of life b/c as you say then it becomes a place of worship. Bless you sweet soul sister. xo

  3. Ordinary is what life is all about. The thrill moments are the icing on top. I love just being in the same room with my hubby. You are right when you say our society feeds us the wrong view from early on in life. So thankful for that knowledge that when the Lord is in the middle, He can make the most mundane become wonderful!!

  4. I don't like ordinary but I loooooove my husband. So somewhere in there ordinary has to become beautiful to me because there's no way to recapture the rush of first love. And I don't want first love if it can't be with my husband.


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